Feeling Lost and Anxious About Retirement Planning - Simple Money Tips for Women (2024)

09 Jul Feeling Lost and Anxious About Retirement Planning

Maybe you can relate to me—at least I hope you can—so I don’t feel like I’m the only one who feels really lost and quite anxious about retirement and planning for it. As a wife and mother of four children, honestly, my time (and limited energy) is tied up in making sure everyone is fed and has clean clothes. Planning for retirement is not even on my radar.

If I start to think about retirement planning, I quickly push it aside because it seems really overwhelming and confusing, and I just don’t want to be feeling that way. Honestly, I think I would rather eat macaroni and cheese for a week straight or walk barefoot across glass than think about planning for retirement. (Well, maybe not the glass, but the macaroni and cheese for sure.)

And it’s not that I think retirement planning isn’t important. It’s just that it’s not very important right now compared to getting kids to soccer games on time and pulling off the next birthday party. You know?

I’m sure that my “retired self” would thank my “younger self” for taking the time and effort to make the decisions needed to have a solid retirement plan, but it’s still kind of scary. There are so many terms and questions that seem like Greek to me … and the truth is … I feel sort of stupid not knowing all this stuff. (And who likes to feel like they’re stupid?)

In some ways, I wish that my husband would just step up and make some decisions about what we need to do to plan properly for retirement. I try to push back the fear and not worry about retirement, but I know it’s coming … eventually. And probably much sooner than I think considering how fast my kids are growing up, and life seems to be flying by so quickly. But I know that burying my head in the sand about it won’t fix anything either.

And who am I kidding? We are barely making ends meet right now. How in the world will we fund our retirement? It feels like an impossible goal, and I have no idea how it could even happen in reality (though maybe in my dreams).

Honestly, I’ve been thinking about how I might as well face the facts and just plan to never retire. I can work for … The. Rest. Of. My. Life. Right? I mean, lots of people do it. So I could handle it … but that’s not really the life I want. I want to be able to be in good health and travel with my husband to see our grandkids, volunteer, and go on vacations. I don’t want to have to work until I die! And I certainly would like to leave an inheritance for my children and grandchildren. I want to be able to buy them things, take them places, and make memories with them … memories that they can look back on when I’m gone.

Unfortunately, neither my husband nor I have access to a 401(k). We don’t have pensions either. We can’t retire on love and a prayer—if we could, we’d be golden! And since terms like Roth, IRA, and RMD are foreign to me, I feel incredibly ignorant and overwhelmed at the idea of all things retirement.

Can you relate? (I hope that you can’t relate because you have your retirement all planned out … but in case you can relate to me, read on.)

So as a middle-aged (yikes!) woman with nothing saved for retirement, I’ve had to get honest with myself. I went to college to become a teacher, and that’s exactly what I need now: a teacher to instruct me about all this retirement stuff. I need to know:

• What my choices are
• How much I’ll actually need to retire comfortably
• What the best options are for my situation
• What it will cost me now
• What I can expect when I retire as far as taxes, fees, etc.
• How to navigate Social Security
• What to do if I outlive my husband or my money

Let’s be real. No one like to think about these things, just like no one wants to plan for their own funeral arrangements. But we’ve got to be responsible, right? No one wants to become a burden to their kids. I certainly don’t want my kids to have to take care of me because I failed to plan for my retirement. How embarrassing! And how unfair to them! I understand that sometimes circ*mstances happen, and things like this cannot be avoided, but I want to do everything I can to take care of myself in my later years and not depend on family members to take care of me.

So back to finding a teacher. No one can know everything, so finding someone to show me the ins and outs of retirement planning is a very natural thing. I’m reminded of the saying, “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”

And I’m willing.

And I’m going to contact a competent and caring financial planner to help me in this area that I’m totally ignorant about.

I know that I’ll need to push back fear and anxiety and stress. I have to focus on what good will come out of going down this road to discovering what I need to do to be financially ready to retire. If I’ll push past the fear and anxiety about this unknown territory, I’ll actually overcome the fear of having enough to live out my last years comfortably without burdening my family. I’ll find comfort in having a plan, rather than hoping things somehow magically work out. I’ll be able to rest better at night and not have to worry about how I’ll survive.

So in the end, I’ll be glad that I had the courage to learn new things and put new practices into place.

And what about you? If you can relate to this, then do yourself a favor and contact the good people at www.russellandcompany.com. They won’t judge you or make you feel stupid; they’ll just take you by the hand and give you the best advice for your situation so that you can reach your goals in retirement and enjoy all the things you’re dreaming of enjoying.

This material was created to provide accurate and reliable information on the subjects covered but should not be regarded as a complete analysis of these subjects. It is not intended to provide specific legal, tax or other professional advice. The services of an appropriate professional should be sought regarding your individual situation.

This newsletter was prepared by a third party company to be used on the Russell & Company and Simple Money Tips for Women websites.